Why change to stay the same?

So Staines is undergoing a transformation to drive new businesses and money to the area and, it is said, sever all links with Sacha Baron Cohens TV creation  Ali G who, according to a local councillor, mademany imagine Staines to be G explaining that the joke was that Staines is in fact more cultured than gangsta and middle England than downtown New York.

The real move is said to be to capitalise on the real Staines - a green leafy busienss centre ideal for companies starting up, expanding or wishing to relocate. However around a third see this as idiocy – burying history in order to appear more suburban and genteel than is strictly true.

What are they changing the name to – Staines- upon –Thames. Sounds like a storm in a teacup to me but ..... what would you rename Staines UK?